- The family of origin is allowed to negatively affect your new family
- You play second fiddle to someone or something else; you feel like you get the ‘leftovers’
- An adult who doesn’t stand on their own financially
- An adult who is a perpetual child
- Triangulation instead of one-to-one communication
- A child is overly responsible for his/her parents
- An individual is overly responsible for another person
- Working too much overtime
- Taking work-related stress home
- Expecting too much of work
- Conflicts with authority or the law
- Trying to change or control other people
- Misplaced priorities
- Minimizing stress caused by others
- Inability to delay gratification
- Inability to follow-through
- Goal-setting that is not value-driven
- Isolating from friends, family, or the world
- Non-stop talk; dominating a conversation
- Not owning one’s own behavior or consequences
- Unrealistic or grandiose expectations of ourselves or others
- Excessive fear, anger, anxiety, passivity, or over-involvement
- Making decisions for people who should be making their own decisions
- Frequent phone calling, tracking another, phoning another at unwanted times of the day or night
- Out-of-control eating, drinking, spending, use of time; drug use; or inappropriate sexual activity
For more details visit:
Boundaries by Dr. Henry Cloud & Dr. John Townsend, ISBN 0-310-58590-2
“Boundaries define everything from football fields to nation-states, yet our culture has pretended it could violate boundaries in human relationships without serious consequences.”
Cal Thomas Syndicated Columnist
Boundaries by Dr. Henry Cloud & Dr. John Townsend ISBN 0-310-58590-2
Where are you?
Make it a practice in your family to have every member promise to keep each other informed of your whereabouts. This includes parents! This means telling someone: where you’ll be, who you’ll be with, how you can be reached, and when you will return.
Healthy Communities/Healthy Youth Berks County
Building Assets, Volume 4, Issue 7, July 2004